Sunday, March 19, 2017

Men's UTRS: The Best Scores of 2017 – Updated March 19th



I've decided to revive the UTRS (Uncle Tim Ranking System), which, for those who care, is pronounced "uterus." For the time being, it's going to be a very tiny UTRS, mostly because there haven't been many meets. But as we see more men, the UTRS will expand.

As per usual, take these rankings with a grain of salt. (Pro Tip: Never bet your life savings based on my numbers–or my predictions for that matter.) Judging varies from meet to meet, and as you can see, I've culled these scores from several meets. I've included the competition names so that you can decide how much crack (or meth) the judges smoked before handing out the scores.

More than anything, you should think of these tables like this: New quad, new Code of Points. What the H is a good score nowadays? I don't think anyone knows right now. So, let me show you…

Key:
  • An asterisk (*): Usually denotes a routine for which I have a final score without a D score.
  • Bold text indicates scores that have been added since the last update.
  • Links, when available, are provided for the top 5 routines.

Notes:
  • The official results sheets for Russian Nationals do not include D scores. I love you, Gymternet, but I don't have time to score every routine on YouTube. Wedding planning > Scoring routines. So, there may be a few Russian gymnasts who have big Ds and aren't listed. If you know who they are, leave their names and D scores in the comments section below.
  • As always, if I missed someone, let me know in the comments. Obrigado.


Men's All-Around Rankings: Best Scores





NameCountryScoreMeet
1. Yul MoldauerUSA86.900Winter Cup F
2. Akash ModiUSA86.300Winter Cup Q
3. Oleg Verniaiev
(Олег Верняєв)
UKR85.699American Cup
4. Allan BowerUSA85.050Winter Cup F
5. Artur Dalaloyan
(Артур ДАЛАЛОЯН)
RUS84.431Russian Nationals Q
6. Kazuma Kaya
(萱和磨)
JPN84.398Stuttgart AA
7. Donnell WhittenburgUSA84.200Winter Cup Q
8. Nikita Ignatyev
(Никита ИГНАТЬЕВ)
RUS83.731Russian Nationals AA

Sunday, March 5, 2017

Men's UTRS: The Best Scores of 2017 Updated March 5



I've decided to revive the UTRS (Uncle Tim Ranking System), which, for those who care, is pronounced "uterus." For the time being, it's going to be a very tiny UTRS, mostly because there haven't been many meets. But as we see more men, the UTRS will expand.

As per usual, take these rankings with a grain of salt. (Pro Tip: Never bet your life savings based on my numbers–or my predictions for that matter.) Judging varies from meet to meet, and as you can see, I've culled these scores from several meets. I've included the competition names so that you can decide how much crack (or meth) the judges smoked before handing out the scores.

More than anything, you should think of these tables like this: New quad, new Code of Points. What the H is a good score nowadays? I don't think anyone knows right now. So, let me show you…

Key:
  • An asterisk (*): Usually denotes a routine for which I have a final score without a D score.
  • Links, when available, are provided for the top 5 routines.

Notes:
  • The official results sheets for Russian Nationals do not include D scores. I love you, Gymternet, but I don't have time to score every routine on YouTube. Wedding planning > Scoring routines. So, there may be a few Russian gymnasts who have big Ds and aren't listed. If you know who they are, leave their names and D scores in the comments section below.
  • As always, if I missed someone, let me know in the comments. Obrigado.


Men's All-Around Rankings: Best Scores





NameCountryScoreMeet
1. Yul MoldauerUSA86.900Winter Cup F
2. Akash ModiUSA86.300Winter Cup Q
3. Oleg Verniaiev
(Олег Верняєв)
UKR85.699American Cup
4. Allan BowerUSA85.050Winter Cup F
5. Artur Dalaloyan
(Артур ДАЛАЛОЯН)
RUS84.431Russian Nationals Q
6. Donnell WhittenburgUSA84.200Winter Cup Q
7. Nikita Ignatyev
(Никита ИГНАТЬЕВ)
RUS83.731Russian Nationals AA

Saturday, August 6, 2016

Betrunken: Your Unofficial Drinking Game for Women's Gymnastics at Rio 2016


Heart palpitations. Sweaty palms. Nervous diarrhea. These are the slings and arrows of a gymnastics fan during the Olympics.

But I'll let you in on an old Soviet secret: alcohol makes everything better. At least, that's what Valentina Rodionenko told me in a dream last night, and everything that comes out of Valentina's mouth is true. (*Cough* Nabieva's perpetual retirement. *Cough*)

So, grab a couple friends and a whole lot of alcohol, and win that Olympic gold medal in drinking. YOU CAN DO IT!